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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27604303">wykiki</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Chicago Med</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Mention of Death, Unresolved Romantic Tension</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 01:28:09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,980</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27604303</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“You’re not alone.” She reiterated and for the first time since his father’s death, he feels solace. In her words, in her. </p><p>—<br/>OR, my own rewrite/scene of how robin would’ve comforted connor after his father’s death.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Robin Charles &amp; Connor Rhodes (Chicago Med), Robin Charles/Connor Rhodes (Chicago Med)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>wykiki</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>my own version of how i would’ve wanted robin to console connor after his father’s death.</p><p>yes, i’m still sinking down my connor/robin hole and writing fics about them even though they both left the show but my hc is that they’re still happily together. fight me.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He sat in the driver’s seat of his car, fingers wrapped tightly around the steering wheel. He’s squeezing them so hard that they turn a pallid white color, his breath hitches unevenly, causing his chest to heave in sporadic chasms.</p><p>His mouth goes parched, a large lump encloses just at the apex of his throat making it hard for him to swallow down the heavy tears that were perched just at the curly ends of his eyelashes waiting to spill over. </p><p>He clenches his jaw when his bottom lip inadvertently trembles. Connor scoffs, wiping away his tear moistened face. He doesn’t know why he’s so upset at himself: maybe it was the years of unjust hatred that he spewed at his father and the primary blame he bestowed upon him for the cause of his mother’s macabre death. Maybe it was because he spent so much time being angry that it ruined the chance he had at ever repairing his tainted relationship with his father. </p><p>Maybe it was because he realized his mistakes too late and didn’t get a chance to apologize. </p><p>Or maybe it was all of the above. </p><p>All Connor knew was that he was angry, overwrought with melancholia and downright confused. He was pissed at Ava for ruining his chance at making amends with his father for her own selfish reasons. </p><p>He was even more pissed at himself for not seeing the truth behind her character sooner. He was usually haste in his assuaging perceptions of people, knowing what kind of person they truly are. He was so foolishly blindsided by her charm that he failed to see right through her. </p><p>Now, because of her, his father was dead.</p><p>He contemplates on how he’ll break the news to Claire. He didn’t look forward to telling her that the reason for their father dying was because of an Insulin overdose that was admitted by a woman who was mentally deranged, and how she claimed to do it on his account. But he also didn’t want to lie to his sister because that’s the very thing that he always chided his father for when it came to Connor demanding to know the truth behind his mother’s suicide. </p><p>He wonders if Claire will blame him. He hopes not, they’d just began to repair their tainted relationship. He’d already lost both parents, he didn’t want to lose his sister too. </p><p>The erratic buzzing of his phone vibrating in his front pocket retracts Connor from his sullen reverie. He releases his grip from the steering wheel in favor of digging through his pocket to retrieve his phone. Pulling it out, he sees Will’s name flashing across the screen. </p><p>Connor exhales a sigh, thumb tentatively hovered over the answer button in apprehension. He eventually tosses it aside on the passenger seat allowing its erratic buzzing as it continued to ring. He couldn’t talk. He didn’t want to. Not when he already knew why Will was calling. </p><p>This is why he’d asked Sharon to announce his departure instead of him giving formal farewells to everyone at the hospital. He wasn’t good with goodbyes. Especially having to part ways with a group of people who’d grown to be like his family of these past few years. </p><p>It was just too damn hard having to say goodbye yet again to people that he cared about. </p><p>The phone eventually stopped buzzing. A loud chirping sound indicated that he’d just received a text message. His eyes lingered over to the screen expecting to see Will’s name and contact information. He’s surprised to see that it was someone else’s contact: <em>Robin’s</em>. </p><p>He reaches over, picking up the phone to read the message. <br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <em>Robin</em>
</p><p><em>Hey, I know you probably want to be alone right now but I was hoping that we could talk some more?</em>  </p><p><em>11:45 pm</em>. </p><p>He swallows, biting on his bottom lip in contemplation. He did want to be alone, there was just so much confusion and anger and sadness reaping through him at the moment that he felt completely stuck. </p><p>Talking to her earlier at the hospital did offer him some semblance of solace, but he bidded his haste farewell to her as he didn’t want her to see him cry. </p><p>Now, as he was perched in the drivers seat left alone with his traitorous thoughts wandering around in his mind, he figures he could use some company to help veer him mind from his melancholic thoughts. <br/>
<br/>
He sends a message responding to her text asking the location of where they should meet. Her response is haste as she informs him of the hotel and room number of where she’s currently staying. </p><p>Connor’s outside her room door twenty minutes later. Hands are slacked in the front pockets of his jacket as he nervously balanced the weight of his body on the heels of his feet. He brings his hand up mid air and rapted a gentle knock. </p><p>He hears light pattering of her footsteps as she gaitered towards the door. He hears the locks un-clicking as she pulls the door open, giving him a warm smile.</p><p>“Hi.” </p><p>He gives her a weary smile, followed by a vague wave of the hand. “Hi.” He repeats, in a monotonous timbre. </p><p>“Wanna come in?” She offers, stepping aside and gesturing a hand behind her where there was a large and very comfortable sofa in view. <br/>
<br/>
He nods, murmuring a quiet ‘<em>thank you</em>’ as he sauntered inside of the room. He walked further inside, feet dragging him towards the plush sofa. He perched himself on one of the cushions. </p><p>“Do you want anything? A drink or––?” She offered, but is cut off by Connor who shakes his head. </p><p>She nods before closing and locking the door. She walks over to where he’s seated, sitting right next to him on the sofa. He’s looking down vacantly, staring at his hands. His shoulders are slumped, face devoid of any emotions. Her heart aches in sympathy for him. </p><p>He’s endured so much pain and trauma throughout his life, more than anyone should. She hates this, seeing him so sad after losing yet another person in his life.</p><p>Robin reaches over in trepidation, grabbing his hand to comfort him. She intertwines their fingers, resting their conjoined hands on her lap when he doesn’t pull away in recoil.  </p><p>They sit there in silence for a brief moment; him staring at the ground, her gauging his facial expressions. She sees his jaw clench when a tear inadvertently spill from his eye. He turns his head, quickly swiping it away hoping that Robin didn’t see. </p><p>But the way her voice lilts a somber tone when she murmurs, “Connor,” let’s him know that she had indeed saw him crying. </p><p>“Connor, hey,” something about the softness of her voice, the way his body heats up when her hand touches his face and turns it so that they’re facing each other, something about the way her eyes look deeply into his, unwavering, nearly makes him bawl out in tears. <br/>
<br/>
“It’s okay to cry and be sad.” She assures him in a soft voice. Her thumb is wiping underneath his eye, drying away the tears that moistened his face. <br/>
<br/>
“No,” He scoffs wryly, bottom lip trembling. “It’s-–I spent so much of my life angry at him. I wasted all that time hating him when we could’ve had a better father-son-relationship. Now he’s gone, Robin. My mother’s gone. He’s gone and I have no one.” He winced in chagrin at the quivering cracks in his voice as he spoke. </p><p>He felt stuck. </p><p>He was infuriated with himself. He was so blinded by this fairytale belief of who he perceived his mother to be that he couldn’t see the reality of how she truly was––broken and sick. All those false memories made him harbor an ill mannered and unjust hatred towards his father who he thought was the reason for his mother’s death. He pinned the blame on his father and hated him with great disdain all of this time, painting him to be the bad buy when that wasn’t even the case at all. </p><p>It wasn’t anyone’s fault. Maybe, they all could’ve paid a little more attention to his mother but in the end, it was her illness that she succumbed to that resulted in her death. Not his father’s infidelity. He knows that now, but it was far too late to make amends. </p><p>Robin shakes her head, turning her body so that she’s fully facing him. Her hands cradled his face in both of her hands. </p><p>“It’s not your fault. You can’t blame yourself for this––for <em>any</em> of this. You didn’t know. You had these memories of who your mother was, you were young you didn’t know any better. Don’t blame yourself for this or else it’ll consume you. And you’re not alone, Connor. You have Claire...” </p><p>He sniffles, wiping his tears away absentmindedly with the back of his hands. </p><p>“And you have me.” She whispers, so softly that he nearly had to strain his ears to hear her. He looks up at her, looking into her umber brown eyes seeing the hesitancy in them. Like she’s afraid that she’s overstepped while he’s still in bereavement. But she exhaled a deep breath and continued to preserver through her shaky nervousness. <br/>
<br/>
“You’ll always have me; as a friend, as whatever you want. I just want to be here for you like you’ve always been there for me. When I was in the hospital, when my mom was going through her chemo trials––you were there helping me every step of the way and I’m going to be the same way for you.” </p><p>He’s staring at her again: silence looming in the air except for the sounds of their synchronized breathing. His eyes wander around her face, heeding in her features attempting to gauge her reactions. He hears the sincerity behind her words, could see it in her unwavering expressions. </p><p>“You’re <em>not</em> alone.” She reiterated and for the first time since his father’s death, he feels solace. In her words, in her. </p><p>“Thanks, Robin. For always being here for me.” He says in gratitude, appreciative that he was still fortunate enough to have someone like her in his life, someone that cared about him deeply. </p><p>She smiled softly. “You’re welcome. Have you called Claire, broke the news to her yet?” She asks. </p><p>Connor shakes his head, lowering his gaze in shame again.  He feels guilty about not telling his sister about their father’s demise but he didn’t know what or how to tell her. His guilt was still panging through him at the moment. </p><p>He already blamed himself for his father’s death because of his involvement with Ava. It’ll absolutely <em>kill</em> him if his sister blamed him too. <br/>
<br/>
“It’s okay. She’ll understand. It’s not your fault, okay? Remember that.” </p><p>He nods his head in understanding. Though it’s easier said than done, as she didn’t know Claire like he did and didn’t know that she harbored the same stubborn attitude that he did, but he knew that she was right. He had to tell her sooner or later. <br/>
<br/>
Connor smiled wearily as he used the sleeve of his jacket to wipe away the remnants of his tears. A groan emanates from his lips. </p><p>“Sorry for all this,” He apologies sheepishly, referring to the dampness of her t-shirt that came from his heavy tears. </p><p>She waves it off in insouciance. “I’m just glad you’re okay. Are you okay?” She asks, to which he nodded somberly. </p><p>“Not fully but I’ll get there eventually.” Connor answers truthfully. <br/>
<br/>
Robin knows that it’s gonna take time for him and he deals with his bereavement. That through the stages of grief he was going to be experiencing conflicting emotions, she wanted him to know that she would be here for him whenever he needed her to be.   </p><p> </p>
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